Last week I asked you to experiment with actually having a conversation with your inner critic, the Drill Sgt. I invited you to tune in to any of the criticism that he may offer you about your worth, intellect, body, self-control etc. and when you heard anything of that nature to say: What is important about ...?

I invited you to keep asking that question "what is important about...?" up to 6 times at a time until you felt that you got to the root of the situation. Until you truly felt that there was no further to go and I assured you that the underlying need that you would hear as the driving force behind the Drill Sgt's criticism would be his need for you to be happy.

Was I right? If you didn't try this, try it now. Yes, just stop right now and check in. Unless you're fairly far along in this process you will easily find a Drill Sgt. comment within. Something about your body, what you ate earlier today or yesterday, something about a relationship issue that the Drill Sgt. thinks you handled badly. It's there. Just look.

Now, ask the Drill Sgt. : "Drill Sgt., what is important about ...." For example if it was a criticism around body that you noticed and the Drill Sgt. was giving you a hard time for the fact that your stomache is sticking out over your pants you would say "Drill Sgt., what is important to you about my stomache no longer sticking out over my pants?"

He will say something like: "Well, you're too fat!" or "You don't look good!" Then you can say, "What is imporant about me looking good, or weighing less?"

The Drill Sgt. will say "Well, no one will like you." Or something like that. And you say? "What is important about people liking me?"

The Drill Sgt. responds: "Well, if people don't like you you won't be happy!" To which you say: "Ah, so when you tell me I'm fat, you're doing that because you think I need to be thin to be happy and you want me to be happy?" To which he replies: "YES!" Ahhhhh, understanding. You've finally heard him. He only wants you to be happy and he has been taught, by society, by key people in your life and by you and your behaviour, that to be happy you must be thin. That's the belief that he's been operating under for years. No wonder he's been so hard on you about reaching your goals around food and weight, he thinks your entire happiness in life depends up on it. If only he understood how undermining and defeating his approach has been!

In this instance we came to the root of the issue in three go rounds. You can expect it might take you 5 - 6 tries your first few times and then typically you will be able to get to the root of the Drill Sgt.'s true intention in 3 or less as well. In fact, you'll get to know and trust the intention of the Drill Sgt. to a such a point that when you hear his criticism you'll be able to say: "I know you just want me to be happy and that way of speaking to me doesn't make things better. Would you say that a different way?" And pretty soon your Drill Sgt. is truly an integrated, loving and supportive piece of you!

Next week we're going to take a look at the connection between feelings of insecurity and Drill Sgt. criticism.

For this week, invite yourself to have at least one of these Drill Sgt. conversations each day.

You can experience lasting change and recovery from food and body image focus. Trust that, trust me if you're willing and actively engage in this exercise. Prove to yourself the loving intent of the Drill Sgt. and begin to challenge those critical statements. Don't let them slip by unattended.

It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power. – Alan Cohen

There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. – Anais Nin

Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death. - Anais Nin

Wahoo! What a great weekend. I am certain that the ladies who took part are feeling a little bit pooped today but as you can see from their feedback and experiences it is a good kind of tired.

We had so many beautiful experiences of learing and sharing throughout each day. Starting each day with some mindfulness practice from Beth Burton-Krahn and closing each day with gentle relaxation with Deb Moncur was a perfect blend of awareness of body, mind and spirit.

But enough from me, let's hear what the ladies had to say abouttheir experience of the weekend!

One part that I really enjoyed was that we all ate together. I've always wanted to eat with someone who knew what I was going through adn then help me get over the feelings I experienced. I also enjoyed that the focus of the workshop was not food! I am definitely going to recommend The CEDRIC Centre. Thanks for giving me insight to my coping strategy and how I may get better.

The group was a good size and Michelle was easy to talk to and obviously knowledgeable. I can't wait to try the new strategies explained.

I found exactly what I was looking for. Answers to nagging questions I could not or did not feel safe exploring on my own. I feel confident and happy that I now have new tools that I will use. They are no- nonsense, common sense ways to approach my eating and to understand why I do what I do. I also found the permission to be authentic, validated and trust myself deeper, to finally have a relationship with me.

I gained awareness that issues I thought I had dealt with, weren't finished. I found the weekend to be a positive experience.

I got a great reminder to spend more time in the present and to acknowledge my feelings, to name them and process them. A lot of tools to use. A lot of knowledge in the handouts. I thought the group format and concentrated period of time was an excellent way to do this counselling.

I really enjoyed the weekend. The information and presentation is really great and I just want to run out and bring this enlightenment to everyone!

What great feedback. Thank you ladies for a great weekend and for your willingness to share and grow. I had a wonderful time and I look forward to touching base with you from time to time and seeing how your lives are changing as you implement these tools in your daily lives. Congratulations on taking a big step in your healing journey and thank you for being such a wonderful group.

Love Michelle

email: info@cedriccentre.com

phone: (250) 383 - 0797

web: http://www.cedriccentre.com